


Forget-Me-Nots and Periwinkles

by RosieTarnation



Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:08:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27428428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RosieTarnation/pseuds/RosieTarnation
Summary: Jamie was wrong.  The Lady in the Lake - her Lady in the Lake - didn't forget, she didn't fade.  She remembers.Or, what happens before and right after that final scene.
Relationships: Dani Clayton/Jamie
Comments: 14
Kudos: 180





	Forget-Me-Nots and Periwinkles

Weddings were hard for Jamie. And Jamie loved weddings – she loved love, she loved that people could share their love in front of everyone they cared about. She loved that it could be a spectacle, a celebration, a proclamation, and an event. 

But every time she got invited to a wedding - from a few coworkers at her store; from a friend of Dani’s that they were especially close to; several customers who’d been using her services for birthdays and anniversaries and proposals then finally the wedding invited her, but she always said no. She knew the second she saw someone come down the aisle, she’d picture Dani. She knew exactly what point of the wedding ceremony would have made Dani tear up and Jamie wanted to hold her hand, but her hand wasn’t there. She wasn’t there. 

These were people Jamie loved (and many that Dani loved, too). These were people she was so happy for.

But she knew, going would just…hurt. She could share in their joy in other ways, comping the floral arrangements for the wedding and giving her sincere regrets that she couldn’t come, saying someone had to stay at the store.

Then she got the invite to Flora’s wedding, and she bet Henry didn’t expect her to come. She understood and she appreciated the invite.

The day she got it in the mail, she did her usual routine of sitting at the kitchen counter and going through the small stack of mail.

She opened the envelope with that familiar name and was surprised to see the invitation. She sat there for a while, looking at, marveling that so much time had passed that the little girl that Dani saved was now getting married.

Her phone rang – it was Owen. 

“Hey,” she said warmly.

“Hey,” he replied with the same comfort. “Did you get it?”

She blinked. “Get what?”

“The invitation,” he said. “To Flora’s wedding.”

“Ah,” Jamie said. “Er. Yeah, yes I did.”

“You’re coming, right?”

Jamie exhaled deeply. “Owen…”

“Come on, everyone would love to see you.”

“Those kids barely remember me,” Jamie said.

“If they remembered everything they’d want you there,” Owen countered. “You remember everything. You deserve to be there.”

Jamie sighed again and noticed she was playing with her ring. Owen was right – she deserved to be there. And more than that, she wanted to be there. She wanted to see those kids, she wanted to see Flora get married, she wanted to see Owen and Henry.

“Fine,” she admitted. “But you and I, we’re getting drunk at some point that weekend. I don’t care if it’s on the plane, we’re doing it.”

Owen laughed. “Deal.”

“How did you know I got the invitation?” Jamie asked after a moment.

“Just a feeling,” Owen said. “I can’t wait to see you there.”

Jamie smiled. She knew she didn’t talk to Owen as much as she should; she knew he missed her and he missed Dani, too. If anyone knew what it was like, what Jamie was going through, it was Owen. But it just got…hard. They kept in touch, certainly; they spoke on the phone occasionally but also often sent emails and letters and gifts for birthdays and holidays. It would be good to see him.

* * *

As the wedding date approached, Jamie felt a certain sense of dread creeping up on her. She was no stranger to a feeling of dread and this was certainly not the worst version of that she’d ever felt.

But, still. It was there.

She felt it as she went through her nightly routine of running the taps and opening the door. That went on for a few weeks before she realized what it was – it was Dani.

Or, it was the thought of Dani. Jamie always thought of Dani, but this was different. This was more than just seeing Dani’s face flash through her mind when she sees a particularly beautiful flower or hearing the echo of Dani’s laugh when Jamie burns her dinner.

Jamie had gotten herself into a situation where she’d be around all these people who knew Dani, who loved her, who missed her even if they didn’t know it, and they wouldn’t know. For various reasons, Dani and Jamie had kept their love quiet for years.

And that didn’t bother them much, because they had their rings. They had each other, when they had each other. They knew, they both knew.

But the kids didn’t know – Flora and Miles didn’t know. Flora only lived long enough to get married because of Dani, because of her sacrifice. And Jamie knew the kids couldn’t know the whole truth – she would never take that comfort from them.

But they could learn something from the story, even if they didn’t know they were in it. More than that, Dani deserved to have her story told.

It was all well and good for Jamie to remember, for Jamie to never forget, for Jamie to know the real Dani, not whatever is left in the lake. But their love, and love for Dani, deserved to be shared. Dani deserved to have her story told and people deserved to remember it, even if they only remembered it from the random story of a random grey-haired family friend at a rehearsal dinner.

* * *

She went to the wedding and wasn’t sure she was going to do it until she did. She hadn’t told her story to anyone – even Owen only knew parts. He knew they got together at Bly and he certainly knew the ending, but the whole story, the whole thing, was something Jamie kept to herself.

But, in the spirit of the event, in the spirit of sharing love, of sharing memories…

Owen makes his speech at the rehearsal dinner about how loving another person is about knowing it worth the pain of losing them. And she knows she has to say it. It is worth the pain to say it.

Still, she really wasn’t sure she’d go through with it until she said those fateful words.

“I have a story.”

* * *

Dani had been doing her ghost thing for a while. She was in the lake, that was always where she was going to end up, but she had plenty of experience with the curse of the lake before she went into it.

She remembered all those times when Miles and Flora would look right past her like there was someone else there, but Dani didn’t see them. She remembered all those times Hannah would just appear out of nowhere.

She knew she could do something so she couldn’t be seen.

So, she spent – oh, she didn’t know how long. Time wasn’t really the same after she gave the rest of herself to the beast in the jungle, the lady in the lake. But she spent time figuring it out. She could leave Bly and she practiced in a few other places – she got a strange comfort knowing she was the ghost in some other ghost stories, but the living people in those didn’t go through what she did. She needed to know her presence could be benevolent, if not just not malicious, before she did want she so desperately wanted to do.

The first time she tried it was a dark and stormy night in her old apartment. It was winter, it was dark early those days. The wind was howling and the snow was piling up on the streets below.

Jamie was making dinner and it made Dani happy to see she had a cookbook out on the counter. It was a small thing, but it meant she was moving on, at least, trying new things.

She stood at the counter, stirring something that didn’t actually smell all that bad. 

She turned to fill a pot with water and Dani watched as she stood there for a moment once that pot was full, just gazing at the reflection, biting her lip and clearly hoping for something.

Dani saw the disappointment on her face for a few moment before she got on with it and moved the pot to the stove.

“Alright, Jamie, you can’t burn pasta,” she said quietly, bringing the pot to a boil. She consulted the cookbook then cautiously grabbed a handful of salt and dumped it into the water.

“If you say so,” she muttered, trusting the book.

Dani recognized this. Dani _missed_ this. Jamie had long since gotten used to working alone in various gardens that got in the habit of talking to herself while she worked. She did it when Dani was still around, too – it wasn’t unusual for Dani to walk into the shop and see Jamie conversing with a bouquet.

Jamie stirred the water, hoping to dissolve the salt (this wasn’t a step in the recipe but surely it couldn’t hurt, eh?) and only stopping for a second to gaze into the water before she carried on.

That’s when Dani realized what she was doing. Jamie was looking for _her._

That put a weight on Dani’s chest that Dani was sure was strong enough to send her right back to Bly. She wanted to leave; she didn’t want to see this. She didn’t want to see Jamie waiting for her and hoping for her.

She looked around. She was near the window but it was too dark to see a reflection; still, she moved toward the corner, taking advantage of the darkness. She could do this, she wanted to do this. She wanted to be with Jamie and it was worth the pain.

“Alright, what’s next?” Jamie clapped her hands together, getting the last of the salt off them. She looked at the cookbook again, when suddenly she scrunched up her nose.

“Oh come on,” she said, rushing to the burner that had her sauce going. It wasn’t a tomato sauce from a jar, no – it was a homemade sauce from a cookbook that the librarian recommended to her. She figured she had to at least try to make something before giving the book back. She was at the library every weekend like clockwork, always getting a small stack of books to get her through the week.

Something was burning in her sauce and she had no idea what.

“Oh, fuck me,” she muttered. She turned the heat off and moved the pan to the cold burner. She looked at the burner she had been using. “Still can’t cook anything in this kitchen without burning it, can I?”

Dani laughed.

Jamie’s head whipped up and turned toward the corner. The wind was howling outside and the water was now bubbling; there were a lot sounds going on but Jamie _swore_ she heard Dani.

“Dani?” she called, voice almost cracking with hope. “Poppins?”

That almost broke Dani. She wanted so badly to let Jamie to see her, to let her know she was there, but she couldn’t. She knew Jamie would say those words and Dani didn’t know if she could disappear in time to stop them. She didn’t know if that was even possible. She knew Jamie would take any opportunity to switch places and Dani would never let that happen.

Jamie could never see her. Dani knew that. It killed her all over again, but she knew that.

So, she stood perfectly still, making sure she couldn’t be seen. She didn’t move but a tear fell down her cheek.

Jamie gazed desperately into that corner, almost willing Dani into her vision.

She turned back after a few seconds. With shaky hands, she grabbed a spatula and scraped up whatever burned bits she could, determined to keep going.

Dani watched her for the rest of the night. It was harder than she ever imagined, but she did it. It had been so long since she’d seen her; she couldn’t bring herself to leave.

So, she watched Jamie finish her dinner. She watched her settle in with a book and a cup of tea and read before she went to bed.

Then, Dani watched Jamie fill the sinks and the tub, stopping to look into both. She watched her open the front door – Dani almost screamed at that, caretaker instincts fully kicking in – and settle in on the couch, sitting up and facing the door.

Dani’s heart broke at that. Jamie was waiting for her, completely. She left the door open (which, unnecessary. Doors couldn’t stop her) for Dani to find her way home to her.

She couldn’t tell Jamie she was never going to appear to her. One, it was just logistically impossible because she couldn’t say it without appearing and two, the only thing that hurt more than Jamie having this much hope was her having none.

So, Dani visited. She visited Jamie the most, but also made sure to see Owen. She never saw Hannah and she knew Owen was hoping for her, too. But she didn’t want Owen to be alone, so she did what she could. She didn’t reveal herself to him, either, but she could tell he felt something good when she was there.

She saw the kids sometimes and was so happy to see they were so well.

But she always came back to Jamie. She stayed there all night, her hand on Jamie’s shoulder – the only way she could tell her she wasn’t alone.

* * *

Dani was at the wedding. Her jaw about dropped when she saw Jamie all dolled up – Jamie was still the most beautiful person she’d ever seen. It hurt so good to see her like this, dolled up and happy and with her grey hair. She’d seen it getting greyer over the years but, still. She was so happy Jamie got so much time.

She was there when Jamie told their story. She couldn’t control the tears then, either.

But then Jamie got to the end. She said the Lady in the Lake lost her memories, that she forgot everything like the kids did. That she forgot Jamie and everything they shared, everything they had.

Dani was never really sure why she could move, why she could spend so much time with Jamie. Even after all these years, she didn’t fully understand her curse. But now she knew. She knew what she had to do. She had to make sure Jamie knew she never forgot her, that she never could. She never would.

She appeared, as she always did, when Jamie fell asleep.

She touched her shoulder. She waited until Jamie was deeply enough asleep – a difficult task, since Jamie had since trained herself to wake up at any sound that could be Dani’s return. But, still, Dani found her moment and even then, didn’t know if it was a dream or not. Either way, she was going to be sure Jamie heard her.

“I didn’t forget you,” Dani said, looking deeply into Jamie’s eyes, begging her to believe her, begging her to know that this wasn’t just what Jamie wanted to hear – it was the truth. “I could never forget you and I never will.”

Jamie opened her mouth, trying to call out her love’s name and see her beautiful, perfect face.

“I love you,” Dani promised, but she was getting further away. Jamie desperately tried to reach out for her but she couldn’t lift her arm. “I will always remember.”

“Dani!” Jamie’s eyes shot open, her arm reached out, she shouted her beloved’s name.

She was awake.

And Dani was gone.

But she knew. She _knew_. She knew Dani wasn’t gone, she wasn’t just a faceless shell of a person under that wretched lake. She was _Dani_ , after all this time.

And Dani remembered.

**Author's Note:**

> My headcanon based on one (1) scene in which we see Jamie reading is that in addition to gardening she also picked up reading while she was in prison so she reads a ton. This will come up in any other fic I write because I love it a lot.
> 
> I also really love this show a lot and this is the first I've written for them. Please let me know what you think! Stay safe out there!
> 
> Also, and perhaps most important, fuck Trump


End file.
